Should you go for your dream?

I never understood my bestfriend A’s fascination, nay passion for KPOP. I thought it was just a phase, a passing fancy that would disappear in time just like a faded and forgotten boy band.

More than a year later, she was into it more than ever. She spent her savings to go to Korea. She would make time to attend their concerts. She would watch their videos for hours on end.

And I thought it was just too juvenile. I mean how can you love something you don’t even understand?

I thought it was wasted passion. I thought she would be better off directing that energy into something more important, something that could change the world.

Thankfully, when we would see each other, she knew when to stop talking about it. I just wasn’t a fan.

It’s interesting how our lives have become so different, when almost a decade ago, we were wrapped up in the same things: boys and beauty regimens.

Now I am journeying through married life. Always doing a balancing act to love my husband, raise our kids, run our home and follow my own passions.

She is enjoying her singlehood. Building her career, going out on gimmicks, falling in love and figuring out what she wants to do next.

“Psst… are you free?”

We like to text like we’re just a few feet away. Her message came in as I was wrapping up my last class for the week.

I was exhausted but I agreed to meet up with her. She said she needed to talk.

After an hour and a half long battle with Manila traffic, we finally met up at the network office. I anticipated we would be talking about a lot of stuff so we needed to be in a happy place — mood lighting, calming interiors, soft couches. Ah… Kozui.

I also anticipated we would be eating a lot so we decided to walk all the way there.

“What’s up?” I asked.
“Nothing really,” she said.
“You made me go all the way here for nothing?!”
“Well, I need to talk.”

I have very few real friends.

When I say real, these are the people whom I can bare my heart and soul to, no barriers, no pretensions. These are people whom I allow to see the real me because I know they accept me and love me for who I am.

Even including my husband, I can count these real friends in one hand.

A is more sociable than I am and it appears she has a lot of friends. But she says she realized the same thing, there are only a few people we can really open our lives to.

On this particular night, we were talking about KPOP.

And our dreams.

“I don’t understand the lyrics of the songs, but when that happens, you can really appreciate the melody, you can get lost in the flow. You really enjoy the music for what it is.”

And right there I understood that her passion for KPOP wasn’t all whimsical. It triggered a desire in her, it helped her give birth to a dream.

On a mission to do an hour – long episode about KPOP, she gathered the courage to be an alien in Korea. To be her own researcher, segment producer, director, assistant and cameraman. She was a one woman team, wandering the winter streets, fumbling through the language she loved but barely understood, battling self – doubt and fear that she might fail if she does it alone.

But when she came home, she carried with her a winning story.

When her special episode about KPOP aired on TV, she got her just reward: recognition, validation and vindication. People loved her story.

“That’s because you loved what you were doing too,” I said. “When you do something you’re passionate about, people notice.”

She says she wants to fly to Korea and study film. She wants to grow her career in a country she felt welcomed her like its own.

“What’s your goal? What are you passionate about?” I remember asking her years ago.

“I actually don’t know,” she said.

And now, she knows. I saw a fire in her eyes I’ve never seen before.

I could see how she would turn into a zombie during hectic days between brainstorming and airing an episode for her show.

And now I am seeing her come alive. Like sunshine melting a field of snow.

I loved that moment. I was happy to see that she found her passion. Now she has a mission to be damn great at what she does.

We have different destinations but we are sharing the same journey.

We are both trying to find our place and make a difference in the world. No matter how small that difference may be.

“Go for it,” I said.

It’s gonna be challenging, exhilarating, frustrating, and fulfilling all at the same time.

In the end, it will be absolutely worth it.

I still can’t share my best friend A’s passion for KPOP, but now I understand — it’s meaningful to her, it’s something that changed her world.

Sometimes it doesn’t matter what you’re passionate about but what you become because of it.

Are you going for your dream?